Dreaming

Lately, Jon and I have been hit with a trial by fire, or so we believe. Our debt, which we had with God's blessing gotten under control in the past two years, has once again skyrocketed mostly due to doctor bills from his appendectomy.

Now that I've quit my job, the reality of paying those bills has become nonexistent. Well-meaning people keep telling us to apply for some assistance from the hospital, but what they may not know is that the anesthesiologist, the radiologist, the surgeon and the pathologist are all from different entities and they have a requirement that one applies for a loan. Paying a loan, let alone four loans, is also a fantasy to us.

Bills, bills, bills. Our lives are kind of run around them, and we don't like it. So, we've determined as a family that we're just not going to freak out about them anymore. When Jesus turned two fish and five loaves of bread into enough food to feed 5,000 people, he first asked his disciples, "Where will we get food to feed them?" It was a test. He wanted them to say, "You can provide it," and that's what we're going to say.

We may never move out of our 500 square foot apartment. But, we've committed to love each other and do so respectfully no matter how uncomfortable we are. The Lord has purpose in this, and a lot of people have it a lot worse than we do.

However, I still dream. Today, Daphne has taken a much-prayed for nap, and I've searched the internetz for my dream home. Just for fun. 

First of all? The kitchen.

My current kitchen is about the size of most people's bathrooms. This kitchen is my fantasy kitchen. I adore every detail minus the strange swan.

I have found three different dining rooms that I love equally. I don't know that I can describe my taste other than comfortable and clean. I am not afraid of color, but I like it when it's used sparingly. I like sparse rooms, I think.

I don't love these wicker chairs, but I love everything else here!

I looked at a lot of different living rooms and while I didn't find exactly what I want (in the imaginary future, of course), I did find some that I really like. Our living room needs to be conversation-centered and a great place to read, because we don't have a television (and don't want one). Book shelves are a must, and these pictures don't show any, but imagine them in other parts of the room. :)

At first I thought this room was too busy, but I love the artwork now.

Just feels cozy.

Now, the bedroom is a room that I've often decorated in my mind. Our current bedroom has white walls, a bed, a dresser, and a bedside table featuring a broken lamp and an ugly tablecloth. These bedrooms feel like a place where I could sleep and wake up renewed.

I know, they are both so feminine, but I think Jon would approve. Maybe.

Because this is my future home I'm dreaming of, Daphne will need a little girl's room and not a baby room. So, here is one I love.

I guess she needs a sister, too.

 And, if we're going luxury, which I think we are, here is an amazing fantasy bathroom.

I love this grey!

Now, my absolute favorite room is this:

because we don't currently have one, and hauling clothes and baby is, well, challenging. If I don't get anything above this picture, I really, pretty please, just want this one.

and, the frosting on top room?

They call this an "outdoor room." Sigh. Just gorgeous.

Now, the truth is, I shouldn't be on the internet scoping out (coveting, ahem) other people's nice stuff. I should be arming myself with the Word because we really are going through a tough time. I don't know why I prefer wasting time, but, sometimes, I'm just beat and this is more fun. So, there you have it.