Thursday, September 29, 2011


That is an annoying combination of 'ugh' and 'uninspired.'

It's ugly.

There is something wrong with my head right now. Mainly, I'm discontent. Recently, my bffs for life and I did a Bible study entirely on contentment, so I've got the tools, but for some reason? It's unattainable right now. Which, from what I've learned, is totally by choice.

See, I could choose to be content. But, I don't. It's the same as this: I could choose not to eat ice cream EVERY SINGLE DAY. But, I don't. (I'm calcium deficient. Don't judge me).

This discontentment creates several problems for me: a poor attitude, a monotonous daily schedule of doom, and a hopeless outlook on the future. Major bummer.

So, inspiration? Laughable. I can barely get through my task list let alone do any extras like 'play with Daphne' or 'be creative on my blog.' (Well, I'm joking on that first one. I only ignore her like 15% of the day).

But, I know me. And, if I don't write something, I will completely give up on my blog (because it's not PERFECT and for some reason, I've convinced myself that means it's worthless). So, even if I think my blog is crappy, I do still hold fast to the reasons I started writing here.

I NEED a creative outlet and I want to document my daughter's early life because I already forget so much.

Here's what I can remember right now:

She copies Jon and me all the time. He rubs his head, she rubs hers (and laughs hysterically).

She started calling her dad Jon. Yeah, he hates it. He gets a slight hysterical twinge in his voice when he says, "No! I'm Dada! Daddy!" He looks at my frantically and says, "Don't even call me by my name, call me Daddy so she gets it!" It makes me laugh so much that I continually call him Jon. Heh.

She fed her dolly some cereal the other day without any prompting. Freaking the cutest.

She is a tank. She runs into tables, falls off furniture, does somersaults and crashes and never cries.

She has 12 teeth right now. Craziness.

She points to everything and says, "That." or at least that's what I think she's saying. As in, "What's that?" This leads to a a lot of grocery store stares. "That's frozen pizza. Those are peaches. That's toilet cleaner." I'm trying to increase her vocabulary, people.

She loves her sock monkey and calls it MoMo. She constantly brings it to either Jon or me so we will make him talk to her in a silly voice.

She still doesn't sleep through the night. Any suggestions? I'm pretty tired, yo.

If you ask her to tell you where her eyes, ears, nose or any other body part is? She will point to her belly button. Every.Time. and say, "Bey but."

We have a lot of fun in the 85% of the time that I'm not ignoring her. Probably soon I'll get used to being poor and bored, and then the contentment will ease in. I mean, she is really darn cute, so that should help.

1 comment:

  1. I'm sorry you're feeling this way but don't give up. I think all bloggers (myself included) have these types of days. Just this weekend I was thinking 'why do you even write, no one cares about what you have say' but I pushed through it & I'm glad I did. You should too!

    If anything, write for yourself. Also, that last photo is adorable!